Is The Party Over?
Posted in All, Drink, What's On This Month on Jul 28th, 2008 No Comments »
When do you call time on the fun? As Manchester prepares for Mardi Gras,
Michael Huckerby contemplates hanging up his dancing shoes…
Pride, Mardi Gras, Manchester Gayfest, whatever you want to call it, it’s upon us once again, as the city fills with gays from across the UK (and one or two from overseas), and for one big weekend, Manchester turns queer.
It still amazes me that every time I go, I see friends from years gone by. It’s almost like a pilgrimage, and as ever, I can’t wait. But recently, as I started telling one female friend all about my plans for the August bank holiday, she actually laughed. “Are you still partying at 32, Michael?” This was the first time anyone had suggested that I was too old to do something… and her amusement said it all.
As I spent the rest of the day searching for ways to escape the miserable Manchester weather, I landed on some cheap flights to Orlando- and who’d have guessed, but they arrived just in time for Disney Gay Days: 120,000 gays from all over the world in Speedos – why not?
It was that ‘why not’ question that returned to me as I boarded my nine -hour flight; and that same worry kept me awake throughout it. Was I told old to party- had the fun passed its sell-by date, and no one told me? As I finally hit the pool party at Disney, I saw guys ranging from 18 (although some looked younger) up to about 60; all of them smiling, swigging beer and looking like they were having the time of their lives. I should have known that staring at people, trying to work out their ages, would get me in trouble. As I ordered another drink, I heard a voice from over my shoulder say, “I’ll get that.” I turned round and saw a cute young man smiling in front of me- he told me he’d seen me looking, and wanted to say hi. I didn’t want to tell him I was trying to work out if he was old enough to drink.
As the night wore on and my young friend was getting ready to go to the real party (please note; this started at 1am) I decided that maybe for tonight, at least, the party was over. I kissed him goodbye, but what came next made me wonder even more. “Don’t you wanna stay and party?” he said,
“you can sleep when you’re old.”
By now, I was truly wondering where in the scheme of things I fitted. One person thought I was too old to party; one thought I was too young to sleep. As a gay man, I don’t have to worry about my kids getting up for school, and as I’m my own boss I have no one nagging me about being on the ball- so I guess if I want to stay out late and party, I can. What I’m not sure of is whether I’ll still be doing this when I’m 40. When I was 20, I swore I wouldn’t be partying at at 30.
I suppose, ultimately, the reason that gay men continue to party in their 30s, 40s, 50s and more, is simply because we can. If you went to Ibiza and saw some straight 50 year old dancing with his top off you’d probably smirk- but perhaps gay men are more accepting of age. We all know we’re going to get there – and secretly we’re afraid that one day, we might be that 50 year old.
When it comes to Mardi Gras this year, it’ll be the tenth time I’ve been. Will I go another ten times? Probably. Will I do the parade and be out all four nights in a row? Maybe not. I know I’m slowing down as I get older- but I don’t believe that means it all has to stop. I don’t imagine myself being the 50 year old man at the party (unless my body is hot- then why not?) but I’d like to think I could still enjoy a drink or two over Pride weekend no matter what my age.
So is the party over for me? Not yet. Should I slow down? Yes..when I’m ready. Do I feel too old? If I can still pull a guy who looks too young to get served… hell, no.
